yerawizardbarry:

when you need to cough in an exam but you’ve already coughed like twice so you just sit there suffocating


xplosivediarrhea:

imagine how much power you’d have if you woke up with a clear face and perfect hair every day


brbjellyfishing:

fun prank: wake up during open heart surgery and sing don’t go breakin’ my heart to the surgeon


gnarly:

*snapchats and texts the same person at the same time*

poopstainedversace:

miucciapet:

who wore it better

id have to go with the pope just cos accessories 

poopstainedversace:

miucciapet:

who wore it better

id have to go with the pope just cos accessories 



jaclcfrost:

do you ever feel like mike wazowski

image





puralize:

you don’t understand how hard it is to take a selfie when you’re ugly


girl: babe come over
boy: I can't I'm having a threesome with an older couple
girl: my parents aren't home
boy: I know

tropicalifornication:

*goes out of room*

*grabs food*

*goes back in the room*

*repeats the next day*


slaughteroftheweeaboos:

ppl my age have children what the hell i am a children



charminbear:

phone calls are the most terrifying thing in the world